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Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Tell Us About Your Book #1

There's still time to send in a quick pitch for your current WIP. It can be up to 200 words and doesn't have to be formal at all. Simply talk to us. Tell us about your story. Send them to unicornbellsubmissions @ gmail.com

Here's the first one for your consideration. It's a more formal pitch tone. Sort of like the elevator pitch you might use at a conference. My thoughts are in purple at the bottom.

The last thing 17-year old Kassandra Dyer remembers is falling from Towers Mountain while hiking with her family. When she wakes up in the dark it’s seven years later. Now Kass has to remember what happened: how she fell, where she went, and what it will take to get back home – if she can. If she even wants to. Because the more she discovers about her lost years the less she likes the person she became.

This intrigued me right away. The part that really pulled me in was that she might not want to go home. Why? I must find out.

The last thing 17-year old Kassandra Dyer remembers is falling from Towers Mountain while hiking with her family. When she wakes up in the dark (I don't think the dark is important here) it’s seven years later. Now Kass has to remember what happened: how she fell, where she went, and what it will take to get back home – if she can. If she even wants to. Love this! Because the more she discovers about her lost years the less she likes the person she became. And this! She just woke up but she's lived 7 years of life in a strange place that she doesn't remember? Cool.

Another thought/question. Was Kass only 10 when she fell?

What do you think? Would you read this and why?

2 comments:

Patchi said...

I love the premise too. My only suggestion is to not use the word remember twice.

Alicia Willette-Cook said...

I Love the premise of this book and can't wait for it to be picked up! :D

Is this the full pitch? If so then I would need a bit more info, I think, on the main character, or maybe the setting...to throw me in a bit more. What time period does this take place? Where are we? That kind of thing. Just a BIT. Not a term paper...